Today was a sample of what the next two months will be like for me in the workplace. I stayed for 13 hours at the job and still felt unsatisfied with my work before I left for home. I still had pending papers & reports waiting to be filled and submitted. It is not usually like this but this is inevitable. Two of my colleagues are on maternity leave or on leave for maternity related issues. I had neck & back pains, and my fuse was so short, I blow off at just about the slightest mistake I notice. I feel sorry for my subordinates as they bear my grouchy state and will have to bear the same for the next couple of months. I don't really complain with the workload, in fact I am up to facing the challenge of making things happen. I'm just trifle worried of the consequences of these long hours and constant pressure to me and my life.
I'm seeing more episodes of staring into blank space, more scolding for my subordinates and more grunts for me in return. I feel that I may lose the human touch in leading the team. I may become so technical that I will lose heart and in turn make everything around me seem lifeless and dry. I have always been the kind to mingle and interact but recently I have been keeping my distance, for obvious reasons that I may have a hard time in identifying where the thin line is.
The bottom line is, I got tired today. But not so freaking tired since I am still awake and able to write this. But still, tired.
I'm dozing off now.. nyt!
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